Backwards law is a very interesting philosophical concept that has always intrigued me.
Aldous Huxley and Alan Watts are two philosophers who brought up this concept.
In simple terms, backwards law means: the harder you try to achieve something the less likely you would achieve it, on the contrary, once you stop trying you’ll have what you want.
“When you try to stay on the surface of the water, you sink; but when you try to sink, you float’ and that ‘insecurity is the result of trying to be secure.”
Alan Watts
I know you might have a lot of objections to this view, but again read the entire article to get what this notion really entails. And philosophy is all about having an open-minded view to these theories.
Backwards law or the reversed law is a paradoxical notion in today’s world where all of us are striving to be happy, to become a millionaire, or to be satisfied in life.
The more one tries to hold on to something they want in their life, the more it slips away from their fingers.
Striving to be happy or more successful makes you feel all the more devoid of it.
The more wealthy you want to be, the poorer and unworthy you would feel.
The more you try to chase things the further it gets. And it further reinforces the fact you lack it in the first place.
If you aren’t happy and are trying hard to be happier and satisfied, you feel more sadness and discontent. Once you stop forcing/trying you find happiness eventually.
Fighting a negative experience means you suffer twice.
“What’s interesting about the backwards law is that it’s called ‘backwards’ for a reason: not giving a fuck works in reverse…..The failures in business are what lead to a better understanding of what’s necessary to be successful…The pain of honest confrontation is what generates the greatest trust and respect in your relationships. Suffering through your fears and anxieties is what allows you to build courage and perseverance.”
Mark Manson
Instead, once you accept it, you become free. Accepting a negative experience is a positive experience in itself.
It’s like, the more you try to fall asleep, you likely won’t fall asleep due to your efforts.
But once you stop and let go, sleep automatically comes your way.
A lot of you may argue, “Isn’t the backwards law an excuse to not have any goals and ambitions?”
“Do we become complacent with what we have?”
“Not chasing any goal would make us devoid of any purpose”
These objections are valid, and I did have them in mind when I first started learning about this concept.
But if you just read it from the surface, you wouldn’t understand the significance behind it.
It’s VERY important to have goals and to strive towards your purpose.
Backwards law doesn’t object towards this but is essentially teaching us, to not force something that we attach our emotions towards it so gravely that we end up not realising what we have.
It also brings significance by accepting the negative.
If you want to be an astronaut and be the first human to visit the sun. You have to accept that it’s freking impossible unless you’re a GOD maybe… or an alien?
But see, accepting the fact something is impossible or rather accepting hardships, which are negative. Brings positive results in the long term.
Which is why its called ‘backwards law’ got it?
No?
Don’t worry I’ll explain.
Forcing something makes us want it more and more, and most of the time it slips away. Yes, there might be exceptions, but you would be lying if you didn’t agree to the fact that the more you tried to attain something it strayed further away/you ended up feeling more dejected and unhappy.
Let me elaborate on what backwards law essentially teaches us:
Gratitude
Backwards law never implied that it’s wrong to have goals or aspirations. In essence, it entails being grateful for what you have presently. To strive to be rich or to be successful, we often forget what we have around us. That makes one more miserable.
We are constantly trying to pile up more and more materials or we give up a relationship/job thinking we can get an even better opportunity, leading to one’s own downfall.
Instead, stop looking around because what you need is within you or maybe right in front of you!
It can also be seen in a way, by which the universe is trying to teach you, to not base your happiness on anything external, true happiness comes from within.
Don’t be attached to the end outcome.
I feel the biggest teaching from this concept is that to get a wish accomplished one tries all sorts of tactics to gain it. Which might lead one to the wrong path.
The more we try to get sexier, the more ugly we feel, the more we try to feel less lonely the lonelier we get, and the more we try to get somebody to like us the farther they go.
We are so fixed on the end outcome that we desperately try to get closer to it, only to be further away.
Once we attach expectations to our outcomes the more unhappy we get.
And this is something I’ve experienced myself. Whenever I wanted something really bad I tried all sorts of ways to achieve it, I ended up getting nothing in return and felt more dejected as all I could see was the end outcome.
Instead, the best results came to me when I stopped trying and actually focused on the ‘now’.
Pursuing the positive causes a negative, and pursuing the negative generates the positive.
I know this might sound very confusing, but I don’t blame you. I was scratching my head when I read it myself.
Let me give you an example: to pursue something positive like- looking more beautiful and attractive.
You end up getting yourself into various skin treatments or possibly multiple plastic surgeries, which makes you feel even more incomplete and unattractive.
You are in constant pursuit to look ‘beautiful’ that you don’t even recognize who you are anymore.
But instead, you accept your flaws and imperfections, you accept that there’s no standard to beauty and learn to love yourself, even though it’s difficult and challenging.
Facing one’s insecurities and learning to love yourself is a negative experience at the start, but it turns into a positive one because you learn to love yourself for who you are no matter what.
The backwards law is all about that, being in constant pursuit of a positive experience creates a negative experience at the end. And once you pursue negative experiences like working for 10 hours at the office or non-stop at the gym. The end outcome is a positive one.
It might still be confusing to some of us at the start. But once you really apply it in your life you would notice the shift in perspective and mindset.
What are your thoughts on this?
